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8 Reasons Men Pay for Sex

Thus far, our journey into a deeper understanding of human trafficking has explained the various forms of trafficking and addressed the importance of maintaining the integrity of human-trafficking survivors. Now it is time to turn to an aspect of sex work that actually receives little exploration or consideration: the buyers. Just as we typically envision one particular type of survivor, we also tend to imagine exactly one type of client; a man who is purely evil, misogynistic, and cruel. While clients like that certainly do exist in the sex industry, they are not the only ones to be found. It has actually been found that there are a variety of motivations behind paying for sexual services, ranging from it requiring “less effort” to just wanting some company. 

Pitts et. al. (2004) and “DemandAbolition.org” outline eight reasons men reported paying for sex:

  • Paying for it was less trouble

  • It is “entertaining”/”thrilling”

  • Their decision was influenced by alcohol or drugs

  • For the company/seeking intimacy

  • To avoid the responsibility of a relationship

  • Because another partner wouldn’t provide a specific sexual service for them

  • To avoid intimacy

  • Pathology 

Of course, this isn’t a complete list of every single motivation out there, but it definitely gives one a look into the mind of a client of the sex industry. While many of these reasons can seem shallow, they aren’t necessarily blatantly abusive in nature. In fact, some of them, like seeking intimacy or company, are really quite sad! It seems to me that the common theme behind all of the above-stated reasons is a severely skewed understanding of love, relationships, and true intimacy rather than a blatant disregard of humanity.

  

Now, I want to be very clear that I don’t say any of this to excuse or explain away their exploitative behavior. I felt this particular topic was necessary because we can’t effectively attempt to combat human trafficking if we don’t first make an attempt to understand the buyers who actively create the demand. Again, I’m not attempting to justify or enable the abuse of anybody, but to simply understand the root of the problem. After all, even the clients of sex workers are human beings who deserve to experience healing and true love just as much as anybody else. They’re just going about it in the wrong way.

   

At this point, you’ve heard what the research has to say and you’ve heard what I think. Now we want to know what you think! How should we approach the buyers and clients of sex workers? Let us know down in the comments. 

  

For more information about the research regarding the motivations of sex-industry patrons, you can go to “DemandAbolition.org,” or check out the article “Who Pays for Sex and Why? An Analysis of Social and Motivational Factors Associated With Male Clients of Sex Workers” (Pitts et. al. 2004).

  

If you or anyone you know is struggling with making healthy decisions regarding the use of prostitution, Crossroads Church offers small groups for breaking addiction and making healthy sexual decisions. You can find more information about these groups at https://www.crossroads.net/groups/. You can also call the Sex Addicts Anonymous hotline,1-800-477-8191. 

  

Remember, shame may tell you that you can never change for the better, but shame is a liar!

  

Pitts, M. K., Smith, A. M. A., Grierson, J., Obrien, M., & Misson, S. (2004). Who Pays for Sex and Why? An Analysis of Social and Motivational Factors Associated with Male Clients of Sex Workers. Archives of Sexual Behavior33(4), 353–358. Doi: 10.1023/b:aseb.0000028888.48796.4f